Non-Football: Felix Bowl VI: The Quest for More Attention (Basketball)
Championships: Thanksfelix Bowl VIII: Backyard Football Bowl I
Thanksfelix Bowl VII: Thanksfelix Isn't All That Clever In Retrospect Player Bio (11/22/2017)
Vinnie The Gooch
I’ve done some crazy ones so far, but this is my biggest game changer yet. Yes, backyard sports fans, I’m comparing Tom to an announcer. But not just any announcer: an announcer from a completely different game!
Tom gets the comparison to backyard baseball announcer Vinnie the Gooch over Backyard Football announcer Chuck Downfield, not because of physical appearance (Chuck and Tom are both strong, houses of men), but because of the mental ability.
Let’s face it, Chuck Downfield has CTE. He’s headed down a bad path. But Tom is a wily, trash talker who uses well crafted turns of phrase to get in the head of his opponent. Chuck could never do that, but Vinnie the G could.
Vinnie’s out there, wearing shades and a pinky ring, eating a corn dog and just slaying dudes via the mic. Here’s some gems from the mastermind himself:
Waaaaiiit a minute. The Gooch does not under any circumstances say "Hi ho". Sunny Day may be saying "Hi ho", but The Gooch just says YO!
Sweet as candy i tell ya! I like candy, everybody likes candy. That's why Halloween is such a popular holiday!
Plus, I bet he’s got some athletic prowess. But let’s be honest, this post is here for the Gooch quotes.
FelixBowl XI: A Tradition Unlike Any Other Player Bio (5/3/2013)
Perhaps known most for his off the field antics, Tom Lorenzi is a student of trash talking. His on field abilities in this field are unrivaled in all of felixbowl history. He has made few appearances at felixbowls, likely because he is too cool to hang out with nerds like me, but his few appearances have been strong. His trashtalking may have made him famous, but he backs up this ability with surprising speed and catching ability. He is like Chad Johnson before he became ocho cinco in many ways.
Thanksfelixbowl II: Somebody Please Beat McGrath's Team Player Bio (11/8/2011)
Tom Lorenzi has shown genuine enthusiasm for making his first real appearance at a Felixbowl which is surprising because normally he mocks most of the ideas of general manager Jarrett Felix. Tom is widely known for his antics off the field, destroying confidence of his enemies while bringing laughter and joy to his friends. On the football field all signs indicate you do not want to be his enemy anymore than you do off it. Tom has claimed he will have Tom Brady-esque sleeper pick value. He has not guaranteed a victory, but he has guaranteed that he will not shy away from contact, trash talk, and straight bullying his opponents. One thing is for sure, Tom’s arrival on the Felixbowl scene will certainly make things much more interesting.
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